We had been married for eight years and I wanted to reconnect with Brad, and give him a gift he would never forget.”
Maybe, particularly in harsh economic times, modern couples who are enduring the dark night of the soul that is the long-term relationship should consider giving each other the same gift Charla gave Brad. Forget the downsides – the missed Everton-Man U penalty shoot-outs, the soreness, not to mention having to think of new ways to keep the bleeding thing interesting each and every night. Accentuate the positive. Think of the free nightly endorphin rushes. Not to mention how much you’ll save by turning out the lights and giving up your subscription to Sky+. Think how close you’ll be to your partner (even if, all things considered, you’d rather be playing online Scrabble, lying about your life on Twitter or taking your Second Life avatar to a roller disco).
What was Brad’s reaction to this gift, I ask Muller. “He turned me down! He thought that scheduling time for intimacy would detract from its loveliness. He also wondered if he was up to it. He said, ‘What would happen if I have a headache?’” So she drew up a list of ground rules, among which was that either party could decline on any occasion.
“Eventually he said, ‘Let’s give it a go.’” As Brad’s birthday neared, though, the couple worried about logistics – how would they find the energy and free time (she works in marketing, he is a salesman), how would they ensure that the kids (aged seven and five) didn’t intrude, and what if there was something really good on telly? “We agreed that TV couldn’t trump intimacy, and that once we scheduled some saucy time, BlackBerrys and emails would be ignored.” What about the kids? “They’re old enough that we don’t have to look out for them every five minutes, so we would often put them in front of a video. We were also much stricter with bedtimes than we had been before. We also weren’t afraid to lock our bedroom door. Sometimes we had a great babysitter for our date nights.”
Nothing like stories about others shagging to bring out the cynics and jealous.
“Another boring American story”, sniffed one commenter. The thread on the story was shut down after 202 comments, several of which the moderator had removed.
I’m going to vote for — exhausting and annoying. I already have enough daily obligations, so many I feel like my brain is going to explode. Turning sex into another one seems a little sad. You want it, or you don’t. If you don’t, deal. People aren’t machines.
Does this — ladies and gentlemen — sound like your dream come true?
Or an exhausting “Are you kidding me?” addition to your long to-do list?