Do you ever find yourself feeling like your life has turned into a crocodile — large, wet, scaly, heavy, unwieldy?
Thrashing wildly in your arms and trying to snap your hands off?
Time to drop that sucker, stat!
Right now, here’s what’s happening in my life, all at the same time:
My new book, “Malled: My Unintentional Career in Retail” (Portfolio) comes out April 14, and I have hired two fantastic assistants, paid from my own pockets, to help me promote it. That means: setting up events and readings, finding people to blog and review and write about it, finding places to promote it on-line, setting up a book tour, etc.
My mom is in the hospital in another country, a six-hour flight away, facing surgery then moving into a nursing home. That means, as her only child with a shared power of attorney with another woman, finding buyers for, and selling: her car, home, contents and finding a nursing home. And managing all her affairs.
My right hand has two weird things happening at once, including a finger that clicks internally and needs to be seen by a doctor and I am sick to death of doctors.
My left eye has finally stopped looking like Frankenstein, bloodshot for a week, quite likely (you think?) from stress. The doctor warned me that until the stress has subsided, it could happen again.
My left hip, which has dead bone in it, makes walking difficult and painful. Now that New York, where I live, is covered in ice and snow, I walk like a Japanese lady in a very tight kimono, praying I don’t slip, fall or shatter that dead bone, forcing me into immediate hip replacement surgery and an eight-week recovery.
I was threatened by a fellow blogger who said he wanted to “beat me bloody” . I don’t laugh such threats off, and called the police, who investigated him, even though he lives in Florida and I in New York. FYI, making such threats is a Class B misdemeanor and carries jail time.
It’s been fun!
But the point is….how to cope?
Drop the bloody crocodile!
By which I mean, and here is the real silver living in it all, it all teaches you to take a break from whatever stress you can. Heave it, like that nasty croc, as far away from you for as long as possible.
Because it will kill you.
I met a woman yesterday to talk business. She’s lovely and passionate and very beautiful, but has already had one heart attack from stress and, after we met, I can see the next one lurking. She is driving herself at industrial speed. She sleeps very little.
So here’s what I’ve been doing to de-stress, and all of it works really well:
Long lunches with very good friends
Long phone chats with very good friends
Sweating it out at the gym and dance class
Sleeping as much as my body tells me to, if that’s 15 hours in one night, so be it
Taking naps during the day, if necessary
Drinking a lot of water and fresh juice and being careful about caffeine and liquor consumption
Reading some terrific books (Keith Richard’s “Life” is one)
What are some of your stresses?
What do you do to cope with them?